Tuesday, May 23, 2006

The Irony of Options....

U cant live with them or without them!

Well..how many times do we recollect ourselves saying.."What other option do I have"?...or " I wish I didnt have so many options...cant make up my mind!"...

Yeah...thats the irony of options...too less and it feels like they dont exist..too many and it makes u wonder why they exist!!...

Well..even more difficult is when you face both these situations together....although on the face of it, it feels like life has presented you with many options to choose from....yet in reality, these options may not really exist...coz there are too many "Buts" attached to each option in life....nothing comes without a cost....does it!?

The debate is always between "What I want to do and what would probably be right for me!"...

And yeah....."Choose what u think is the best" or " Where do you see your life going?" or "Whatever you choose will eventually be best for you".....kindly note...such comments DO NOT help and are not welcome!":-(

And yeah as most men would say now.."See, thats why we say, women can NEVER decide"...so yeah. its true for me..I DEFINE INDECISIVENESS!!!!....

Hmm....maybe I will just have to resort to flipping the coin.....


Monday, May 15, 2006

My Hero...

Yes..for 2 hrs we were in the theatre ...eating lehar kurkure and my hero(Hubby Dear) was "saving my life"....from the evil goons...while err..I was sitting right next to him!

We went to see MI3 over the weekend--for me the only motivation being to oogle at Tom cruise (so what if hes 40....hes still as much a lech material!)...and thats that...it didnt matter if the movie per se was nonsensical and the action was'nt even that grt...and that's how I assume it is for most women...

However realised that for men..(generalised based on Hubby dear's behaviour)....watching sports or a movie is not about watching the movie or sports per se..its about feeling like the Hero himself who either scored the goal or saved his wife for those 2 hrs !!!!

Yes throughout the 2 hours Hubby dear kept believing he is the Hero and especially 'My hero" with statements like..."If u get kidnapped baby then....I will also come and save u....like him now I am gonna jump!! "I will also ride the bike like this","See even I run like him"..."Dont worry, I will also punch him like that"..blah, blah!!...

And of course I had to play along by asking questions like--"But Tom Cruise has a team to help him..whom will you get to save me"!...to which the reply was "Dont worry, I will get"A"..(his best frd) to mastermind the whole plan..and then I will come and rescue u"...!...Thank you god for giving me literally a Knight in Shining Armour!!:-)

Finally I had to burst the bubble and tell him 'Honey am right here, ur not a secret agent and well...I dont think I have any intentions of being kidnapped.....so lets leave all this for Tom Cruise..he gets paid in millions to do all this crap u see":-)

It was almost like young boys who have just got a new gun and they pretend the enemy is around them and shoot like they'r the brave hero cop....killing everyone around!!...bang, bang!!

Guess that's why they say...Boys will be boys....guns, gadgets and girls...prasadise for them!

Thank you honey for "saving " my life yesterday and for being so cute!!....Lets please watch a mushy romantic movie next week...Id rather see u imitating the romantic dinners and cute pick-up lines !;-)


Ducking your Boss

Why is it that EVERYTIME I dont feel like working my boss decides to play the devil!

Oops! After 4 years of work life and 5 bosses that was a silly question to ask really--Thats what the deplorable species called "the BOSSMATE"(thats my contribution to the dilbert diary) has been created for-To make us realise we are lowly souls and mere mortals and our fate embraces torcher...sigh sigh!

All MBA courses should have a specific "mandatory" subject on "Seven Effective tactics of ducking your boss"...for now based on my indepth and varied experience with my various bossmates the genieus in me has been able to coin these for the larger good of mankind on how to handle your bossmate...

1) If he sits close to you stare at his screen more than he does at yours--make him feel guilty about even writing a personal one liner mail!

2) Dodge your cubicle inhabiting timings-when he goes for lunch--take a short nap and when he's back--run for food like you live for it!

3) Everytime he opens a unofficial site--"Ask inquisitively and "innocently"--"Hey isn't there supposed to be a firewall on this site?"-Basically let him realize he's being watched!!:-)

4)Put as many stuffed toys and caricatures on your PC as you can to show as little of the screen--maybe even a huge--"Mind your own business Garfield Teddy!"

5)Keep putting his stuff (like pens, papers, his important documents in other cubicles away from his cabin--FAR AWAY!--when he's not around so that he has to keep spending as much time as possible away from you (always have the belief that its "YOUR" area and he is an intruder there) and you can live in peace:-)

6) Type vigorously on the keyboard (like ur murdering the keyboard) with a constipated and intense look on your face EVERYTIME he's around--This look is a substitute for a "Am dead busy" placard

7) Sneeze, cough and pick your nose everytime he attempts to turn around to see you--basically disgust the hell outta him!!

8)If none of this works--QUIT!--your a loser--join a company where you are the boss--you deserve to become one!

All the points mentioned above are views of the author and have been based on extensive trial and error and more trial and even more error, research & observations. Only those with a brave and adventurous heart and rich parents/ fiance/ spouse are advised to try these.

Any consequences through any of the above points are merely coincidental.


Wednesday, May 10, 2006

Reply to Hubby's Open Letter:-)

Hubby Dear,

Thank you for the letter-it seems quite professional and polite. From the last week(ever since our return from bangalore) you have been "pestering" me to "re-negotiate" our terms of contract which you signed earlier this year-I need to figure out who is the culprit behind this! (please note juice is not alcohol and drinking juice doesn't get one drunk)

Let me first explain that in order to negotiate the contract--you need to have executed atleast "some parts" of the contract--may I request you to please list down all the responsibilities which were assigned to you and which you have "actually executed" before we start re-negotiating???:-)

My responses on your points below:-

1)I too have studied economics for 5 years and thank you for reminding me the theories and even more how these can be applied to real life situations. One more concept we learnt in economics (which I hope u remember) was "Optimum utilization of available resources"--and I am a die-hard follower of this concept. The excel sheet of roles and responsibilities intends to put this concept to practice--using the "resource" called "The hubby" to optimum use:-). Also according to the xl sheet there was supposed to be equal division of labour--in case you haven't realized 90% of the house work is "still" being done by me....sigh!(Thats what marriage does to u!)

2) One thing I have not told you too-which is--men who have a inferiority complex are a big turn on for me honey. I would suggest you live with your inferiority complex so that we lead a happy, contended and sexy life! As for the kisses sure they will continue honey...muaaah!

3) I agree you are clumsy--and this is something you have said not me. If laying and clearing the dinner table is creating stress for you--I would suggest from today onwards we have dinner in the kitchen itself. That would be the perfect solution--that way we don't even need to fight for the remote while having dinner--wat say? ;-)

4) Not quite sure which discussion you were referring to--however this morning the clothes were put in by me simply coz you were too busy snoring:-). In case you think handling the washing machine is "too complicated" for you--I can suggest a simpler method-wash clothes with your hands!...am sure u can handle your hands without any problems..right baby?

Please note-you have a really cute butt(have told u so too-cutest EVER!)...in fact women often love cute butts!...however sitting on your ass for too long will flatten your butt and that would be terrible--especially all the hot chicks that you will get to flirt with in Germany!..So its in your best interest to not keep sitting on your ass for too long!:-)

Yours lovingly,

Lotsa love , hugs and MUUWWAAHHHHS

The Wife

p.s:- Yes you can take the soft pillow and blanket but no AC sweety!:-)


Monday, May 08, 2006

Am back!

Yes am perfectly ok-safe and sound, alive and Kicking and not given up on blogging yet....for all those who were wondering....if I was "letting go" blogging...sadly for all you guys...the torcher of my blogs is resumed and continues!:-)

The last week was spent in my second fav city in the world bangalore(bombay being the first!)...and needless to say....I was literaly in a mood to throw a tantrum on the airport to not come back at all....

Even after 7 mths...the minute I landed on the bangalore airport..it felt like I was never away from it..for some reason only India can do this to u!

Even though 1 week was too short by any standards....it was every inch worth it...

Right from the terribly heat and humidity

House hunting in the ever-so crazy crazier and craziest traffic

The two darlings,J and Roze who actually came to the airport at 1 am in the night just to see me!-Muaahhhhs to both of u!

Eating...read (thulping) as many dosas and indian food as I could digest without throwing up, especially hot idlis for breakfast!

Meeting most of the friends and people who mattered to me...

For all the tight hugs from EVERYONE I met--been almost 8 mths since anyone besides Hubby gave me a tight hug!!

Staying with J my ex roomie with whom have spent 3 yrs....the back home at last feeling!

Watching my first hindi movie on big screen in 7 mths-"Darna zaroori hai"...missed the whistles in the theatre though!--why have people stopped whistling..!:-(

Playing pictionary with the "gang"...Thx truckers letting me relive the simple pleasures of life

Having Mc Donalds Veg burger....yummmmm (HK doesnt have any concept of veg burgers!!!)

For a brand new hair-cut--which according to my friends makes me look Chinese (Am ignoring this comment!)

Thx all you guys...for still being the same crazy people that u always were....and thx for still loving us as much!

Love ya guys!