Thursday, April 14, 2005

B-rrrrraaatttt!!!

"The good part about marriage is that after a hard days work--you always have some one to come back home to"!--My husband favourite line!

So true.....Tuesday evening I finally agreed to this--the pleasures of marriage, never though I would say all this -but feels wonderful that I do have someone to come back to after a bad days work....so what if that someone is squeaky, has a tail, whiskers and is really creepy and dirty!!!!

I married my boyfriend--but am living with a rat!...

Tuesday night after I realise that my humble abode had been attacked by the creepy enemy I decided to stand-up and play the brave soldier -Bravo!

So after gearing myself with armour( shoes which covered every inch of feet to ensure no contact with the enemy) , trying to make some noise (screaming, yelling, shouting, banging)breaking all hell loose in the house I realised I could not play Alexander--I needed an army!

So after running around to find someone, anyone who could protect my kingdom from the onslaught of the rat, I finally found my army -a noble watchman was dragged to fight it out. After 2 hrs of "battle", jumping across the kitchen till 12:00 on the night trying to provide morale support to my soldier to do the "fight unto death"....the rat remains.

A tired,exhausted, sleepy, wounded me...decided to play it smart and use the strategic warfare technique and laid a mousetrap....the trap was laid with tomato as a bait..the enemy came, nibbled at the tomato , enemy left... trap refused to work....rat remains!

So after trying all I could---I have decided that the only way out is to play it humble and adopt the request( read beg, plead) technique with Mr rat to leave my kingdom....

Dear Mr Rat,

This is with reference to our brief encounter this week where you almost fell on me. Would like to begin this letter by first apologising for "disturbing" your meal( on snacks bought and paid by me) in the cozy corner of my house. The intention was clearly not to harm or disturb your lovely dinner in any way.

In the recent two days ever since you have decided to invite yourself as a guest to my house I am having sleepless nights and nightmares about you(Sorry If I am sounding harsh). Also I have noticed that the entire top shelf of my kitchen (which incidently is my favourite junky food shelf) has been bitten, eaten and left wounded by your attack(I repeat all paid by me not you)--has been an immense source of pain for me--Sigh!

In context of the above would request(read beg, plead, on my knees) you to find another abode for your establishment since I do not see, much as I might like,this association working out in the long run. Would appreciate if you could give me a time and date for the exit.

If you do agree to move out, for your kind gesture, we would be glad to offer you a piece of bread(with butter if you choose) as a Parting gift! (open to negotiations)

Hope you would consider the request and take appropriate actions at the earliest.

Looking forward to your response.....
Ekta

p.s:- Pray this works......Amen!

1 Comments:

At 6:14 AM, Blogger Hawkeye said...

Mr Rat: You didnt say phlease.

 

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